Well it's not really baby preparation but every other title I came up with made it seem like we already had the baby versus what this post will actually be about.
Over the past few years but more recently I've heard a lot from others parents. I thought it'd be cool to summarize a little bit of what sticks out in my head now. I thought it'd be really cool to read later to see how everything measured up. I don't think any single thing I've mentioned was told me me just by 1 person.
Based on all the "advice" I will have the toughest time adjusting to a new baby and taking care of a new baby. It will be quite interesting to figure out what can be done to calm the baby and get her to sleep. Breast feeding will be tough at first. It will be challenging. They have lactation groups that might be helpful and I should look into them. The first few weeks will be extremely tough getting used to a new baby. People are shocked that family isn't coming out to help in that time. It's not just getting used to a new baby that makes it difficult but I will be in a lot of pain and my hormones will be crazy.
Granted there is also conflicting advice that I'm hearing. I get comments from people too about what clothes I'll like or a baby will like. I haven't even thought too much about clothes. I don't know what I'm currently missing for a newborn. I'm waiting until we get the Amazon discount for what wasn't purchased on the registry which is 30 days prior to the due date and then go from there. Some have loved the things that swaddle your baby and some have not. It's also interesting talking to new parents versus parents of kids 20+ years ago. With so many regulation changes and inventions it's just a different thing to hear about. I'm not sure how every new thing can be the dumbest thing ever though.
Overall I think my main perception is that I can't predict a thing besides not getting sleep for awhile. I don't try to make specific plans because nothing will work out whatever way the plan is. Even though I'm mentally preparing myself for the adjustment to be hard based on everything I've heard, I think it'll still end up being worse because everyone else heard what I heard and they still said they were in for a shock.
I probably didn't type about a lot but figured I might as well post this instead of having the above sit in my draft folder for months.
I agree with all of the advice you've been given, at least in this blog post. The hardest part for me was going from only worrying about myself to worrying about someone else. It's like I wasn't even important at all anymore. My entire life was about someone else. I'm a naturally selfish person, so that was extremely difficult for me. But now it's like second nature. I always consider how things will affect Parker before I think about me.
ReplyDeleteI guess to my benefit people have been telling me that I already spend too much time thinking about others and need to focus on myself. I usually say they are nuts and it's good to think of other people too. So I guess I won't have as much adjusting.
DeleteAlso I think you might have been one of the ones that thought family should visit shortly after the birth to help out. I forget. I know I heard that from like 10+ people so it's hard to keep track of who said what anymore.
DeleteI can't imagine wanting to deal with a house guest and a newborn.
DeleteI think after a newborn you don't care to be nice to a house guest like you might normally but then with a guest you force them to help with a crying baby or something.
DeleteWish I had any of my family, or a friend who could have helped me after my C section with Dave! I was in mad pain.
DeleteYeah I was in the 'pro to family visiting' camp. I still am. As long as the guest knows their place. It's not the same when you have a baby as any other time visiting. They should come with the expectation of not getting in your way at all, and only being there to help you in any way possible. The last thing new parents need to deal with is entertaining a house guest in the conventional way. Anyways you have Dave for a little longer than normal so hopefully that makes a difference. I only had Tanner a few days.
ReplyDeleteI didn't want family around. :) But I'm weird like that. I didn't feel like I'd be able to handle not feeling like I needed to be hostess. Plus a lot of people really forget that you need help, etc. With that said, though, my sister visited when Neil was about 1 month and she was AMAZING. But the first few days I was very glad to be by myself with Dave and Neil. It's a personal preference though.
ReplyDeleteAnd I agree with Julie though- once your husband goes back to work it is all new territory and THAT is really when I wish I'd had help/someone to talk to. Most of our family is too far away though. I lived for the weekends when I could actually take a shower and not be constantly peeking out to see Neil (who was in a bouncer outside the shower, often crying).
I remember my mom saying my gram (dad's mom) wanted to help so my mom didn't want her living with them constantly so she just asked for food so then my gram cooked food and that was helpful. I don't know if that was with all 3 kids or just 1 of us though.
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